Attention. Any member of my family attempting to read this post, please return to your home page. The contents of the post are a snapshot of my life and how I live my life. All thoughts and feelings are my own and any information that could link this post to any of you in any way has been negated. Thank you for your cooperation in this matter.

Another week from hell? You betcha! So, I've had family problems, we all know that. This week, it has reached the lowest point. I have basically been disowned by my family. This is due to a combination of my decision, the timing of the announcement and the opening up of old wounds that, perhaps, should have been left well alone. I'm not going to shirk my share of the blame for the last part, or the timing of the announcement, but no one else is innocent. 

Through this blog, you only get my perspective of the issues involved. In my mind and wherever possible, I try to get both sides of the story to make an informed decision. This will be difficult for 100% of the readers of this blog as you do not know my family and probably never will. How you view the events, thoughts, feelings and general shenanigans of this blog is up to you. It's a snapshot of me, my life and how I see things. Nothing more, nothing less.

So, what now? Given my feelings of loneliness recently, this is a major setback. It hasn't affected my decision and it will make it easier in some respects. However, the lack of family support does hurt. I know I've had two years to get to this point, whereas they have only had a couple of months. I'm hoping that, given time, they will come round and if not be a major part of my life again, at least be there for me. I'm not going close the door. It will always be open.

Now time for some more upbeat news and events. I had a letter from the Gender Identity Clinic (GIC), inviting me to a new patient workshop. This workshop aims to give the attendees information so we can be as prepared as possible and have progressed as much as we can before our first appointment. First question - can I get the day off of work without alerting my employer? Luckily I had one day of holiday left, so it was duly booked. So I sent the attendance form back and will now wait for the workshop. Things are beginning to move forward, albeit very, very slowly. 

I have also been asked to be a member of the local NHS (National Health Service) Partnership Trust. I'm presuming that this is to add to their cross-section of the community and another box ticked. (Perhaps I am being too cynical?) In any case, it will allow me to have a say on certain issues in the community, mainly mental health ones. We'll see.

What does this week hold? Crimbo shopping, the free meal & drinks owed from the local bar with the dodgy door staff, Games night, some minor religious festival and a birthday party. Busy, busy, busy...........!!

Not much from me this time. However, I have had good evening out and I have gained a few more board games out of it! The Secret Santa Soiree. I had to work the morning of the do, so couldn't have a relaxing morning to chill out. I had intended to get some stuff ready the night before, but me 1,0 was having family issues so wasn't really in the mood. So, after work, battle commenced. A couple of hours later, this vision emerged......ME! It's getting easier to get ready now, I have a routine which at the moment, seems to run very well. There is still time to be saved, but until hormonal changes occur, I can only do what I can do.

I was ready, but earlier than I thought. An hour earlier than I thought. Um.......what could I do for an hour? Play dress up! So I tried a few outfit combinations and a couple of the wigs I haven't worn in a while and had a bit of fun. after about 4 outfits, I got ready to go again. I was going to get the train as the venue was near a train station, in a local town. I got my heels on and walked to the station. Another 30 minutes in heels. All good practice and now I have calves of steel! Shock horror, I walked through the local town again and got on a train. A busy train. 

It was only two stops long and off I got. Through the busy station and onto my destination, which this year I found without too much trouble. I was the first one there. I was slightly nervous as I hadn't met some of the people who were going. The friends who had arranged the night have been really supportive. In fact, one of the phrases used by one of the friends has stuck with me and I used it when I saw the Mental Health doctor recently. It still resonates with me now and it is true. 

A glass of wine was appropriated, rose of course and I started to relax. Once everyone else arrived, I felt fine and natural. We played games, one of which I am going to have to buy, ate some fabulous food, had a few drinks and the purpose of the evening, Secret Santa. Given the situation, there wasn't any time to hand out names, so we were asked to buy a present, up to a certain value, that we could give anyone. I'd bought a Yodelling Flamingo - which went down very well. I got a set of 6 board games, in a wooden box and a game of charades, which, given the time of year, will come in very handy! 

Then, before we knew it, it was time to go home. I'd had an excellent time, felt relaxed and thoroughly enjoyed myself. I was offered a lift back with another close friend and his girlfriend -which I was grateful for as I didn't fancy a long walk which either form of public transport would have given me! Once home, it was time for the pumpkin, aka me 1.0 to reappear. Well, me 1.0 is a bit round and orange..............! xx

Cheeky mare! Round, perhaps, Orange? Milky white normally, even in the height of summer. Another week beckons. A better week? Who knows. Only time will tell.